Fun with Photo Editing

Boy, did I have fun today. I bet I will hear about it when Roy gets home tonight. I'd like to point out that aside from the awesomeness that you see here, I also iChatted with Jenn for the first time, which was Awesomeness on a Stick, and I got two, count 'em, TWO loads of laundry done. A really fulfilling day.

I apologize if the lovely lads in this pic don't think they look good. I think you both look awesome. (That's the word of the day, BTW.)


I believe I was practicing my Edward-smolder here...


Hanging out in the woods, always fun...

Put in your orders now for this limited-edition framed print of...me...in my awesomeness...

So that you don't think I'm totally vain, I included a collage of some of the magnets that we purchased recently for our new white board in our office-revamp-in-progress. These are available at your local Michael's store for the low, low price of $1 each. Can't beat that.

And I'm spent.

Update: I added a vacation collage to Red Photo...http://red-photo.blogspot.com/2009/03/stay-tuned.html

Another "New Moon" cast member added..

BBC News is reporting that 20 year-old Jamie Campbell Bower has been cast as Volturi vampire Caius for “New Moon.” The British actor’s first big screen credit was Anthony Hope in Tim Burton’s “Sweeney Todd.” Bower might just get along great with “Twilight’s” leading man and fellow Brit, Rob Pattinson. Bower is also a musician and last year he had a small part as a rock star in Guy Ritchie’s “RocknRolla.” Maybe we’ll see a Pattinson/Bower collaboration on the “New Moon” soundtrack?

In the book, Caius is described as having shoulder-length, white hair and “paper-thin skin.” An outspoken member of the Volturi leaders, Caius threatens Bella’s life and forces a decision that shapes her future with Edward. He is also the only one of the Volturi leaders that does not possess a special gift beyond normal vampiric abilities.

If Breaking Dawn, the fourth and final book in Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight Saga, comes to the screen, the calculating Caius would likely be called on again as he plays a big role in the showdown between good and evil.

News on the casting of the Italian vampires for “New Moon” continues to trickle in. Last week, I reported that Canadian model Noot Seear was chosen to play the sexy vamp Heidi and the role of uniquely gifted Jane went to Dakota Fanning earlier this month.

What do you think? Are you surprised Chris Weitz has tapped a 20 year-old to play one of the ancient vampires?

Update: I wrote this under the impression that it would be used on MTV Movies Blog again. They didn't end up needing it so I posted it here because it was already written. I will not attempt to make this a "Twilight" news blog.

My Little Bully

I was an absolute angel as a child--just ask my mom. Honor student, involved in all kinds of activities and in some cases, I was even a teacher's pet. I didn't get in trouble with my teachers (except in Kindergarden when I wouldn't stop talking to the other kids, but that doesn't really count) and I was never sent sent to the principal's office (except that one time, but I'm telling you that Kelly chick brought out the worst in me). I would never have thought that a child of mine, a girl no less, would be the kid that gets in trouble at school. And yet here we are.

It has become pretty common for me to arrive at school in the afternoons only to have her teacher pull me aside to tell me that Anna... 1) had a potty accident 2) didn't listen during --- activity 3) wouldn't help pick up toys 4) called everyone in the class "stupid" or 5) levitated her teacher as she spewed green vomit and her head spun 360 degrees. This all bothers me, but I know that there are worse problems she could have and we always talk about the issues at home and do our best to address them. So, I was pretty surprised when her teacher relayed this story recently...

They were outside playing and Anna was riding on one of the tricycles. Another girl was riding in a little car and they were approaching each other going opposite directions. They know that they are supposed to stop when they see "oncoming traffic" and the other little girl did so. According to the teacher, Anna purposely sped up and rammed the other girl head on, knocking her off the car. The other girl was not hurt, but crying hysterically. The teacher said Anna found this very amusing.

This doesn't sound like my baby at all. I was horrified when I heard this. The only thing I can think of is that she didn't realize the other girl might get hurt--I can not imagine her intentionally hurting anyone. I'm sure she just thought playing bumper cars would be fun. I wouldn't know where she gets that, considering that her father purposely rammed our paddle boat into a submarine on vacation, but I'm not laying blame, Honey.

I scolded Anna at school and then retold the story for Roy so that he could do the same at home. But then I screwed up. Roy is in the middle of his speech about how she needs to listen to her teacher and if she ever does this again she won't be allowed to ride the bikes anymore and then he pauses and asks Anna if she understands. She looks up at him from under her lashes (she's very good at that) and says in her angelic voice, "But I was being funny." Roy starts to retort that the situation was NOT funny and I just burst out laughing. Anna turns to me with a huge grin and says, "But Mommy thinks it's funny!" Roy shot me a scathing look (he's very good at that) and informed Anna that "Mommy sometimes laughs at inappropriate times."

My problem is that I don't HAVE a poker face. If something is funny, I laugh--I can't help it. Her adorable little face, her sweet little voice, the startling conclusions that her young mind comes to...they all just make me laugh. It happens a lot lately. She is just SO cute and I attach a lot of emotions to her every movement. I just stare at her in wonder and think about the fact that I CREATED her and she has parts of me and parts of Roy. And the fact that she has grown up before my very eyes is mind boggling. I am truly in awe every time she figures something out or responds to something in a mature manner. She has me wrapped around her finger and she absolutely knows it. I can't help just grabbing her and nuzzling her cheek. I feel entitled to take advantage of this closeness now because I know that someday soon she is going to start pushing me away.

Roy commented that he never would have guessed that of the two of us, that he would be the one doing the disciplining of our child--Probably because he was a wild youth. I tried to explain to Anna that the situation wasn't funny, that I was responding to her face at that exact moment, but the damage was already done. So, I absolutely anticipate more playground violence and I apologize in advance if Anna smacks you around to get a laugh.

I'm published!!

That's right. I just got my first by-line on MTV Movies Blog! I am bursting with excitement! Leave a comment on their blog and tell them that I need to write more stories!! :)

http://moviesblog.mtv.com/2009/03/26/runway-model-noot-seear-snags-vampire-vixen-role-in-new-moon/

Something for the guys...

Now available....Anchorman's Sex Panther cologne. "Illegal in nine countries. It's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good. They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time."

I'm going to make an effort to beef up my blog so that it is macho friendly. I'll scour the internet to find you the best guy stuff, so you don't have to.

Seriously, internet surfing is a full-time job. I'm just waiting for the paycheck.

The mysteries of toddlers explained

Finally, someone has unlocked the secrets to why toddlers don't do what they're told.

"If you just repeat something again and again that requires your young child to prepare for something in advance, that is not likely to be effective," Munakata said. "What would be more effective would be to somehow try to trigger this reactive function. So don't do something that requires them to plan ahead in their mind, but rather try to highlight the conflict that they are going to face. Perhaps you could say something like 'I know you don't want to take your coat now, but when you're standing in the yard shivering later, remember that you can get your coat from your bedroom."

I'm so glad they cleared that up. Now I won't have to pull my hair out every time Anna ignores me. Instead of saying, "Go to bed now!", I should say, "Hey, you can stay up and play all night if you want to, but tomorrow when I fall asleep on the couch because you were jumping on my bed so I wasn't able to get any sleep and you decide to fix yourself some lunch and you burn down the house, the number you'll want to dial is 911 and you'll realize then that you should get some sleep tonight. Although it may be difficult since we'll be sleeping in the van and it is likely to get cold, so be sure and take a blanket because you'll want it later."

My favorite line from 'Twister'/'Star Wars"

The line is originally from "Star Wars: A New Hope", but when they repeated it in "Twister" it just cracked me up because it was kind of random. You can really use it for any occasion. "That's no moon...that's a big poopy diaper!" or "That's no moon...that's a Dulce de Leche cheesecake and I'm going to eat it all!" See?

"That's no moon. That's a space station!"

Portrait of a Twerd

That's right. I admit it. I'm a Twilight nerd and proud of it. Rockin' out my Team Cullen t-shirt and my Twilight necklace. Check out the red eyes....Oops, I'm a naughty vampire.

Anna and I made lamb and lion cookies for the DVD release party. They were more defined before they were baked...they just look like blobs now. I blame the 3 year-old.

I had fun with the girls Saturday night, but as usual, I was busy drinking and forgot to take pictures. Shout out to Carrie, Denise, Hilary and Amy! We had leftover black vodka from our Halloween party, so Roy used to that to make screwdrivers. It looked so cool in Martha Stewart, but it just ends up looking gray when we do it.

Speaking of Halloween, here's me as Glampire, holding my bloody pina ghoulada. What Martha didn't mention was that the corn syrup runs down the glass and onto your hands, which will then be dyed red for the next 2-5 days.

A-n-y-w-a-y, I bought the 2-disc DVD from Borders and I was not impressed by the Borders exclusive extras. There was a yawn-fest of a book club Q & A with Stephenie Meyer. Dear Lord, I couldn't wait for that one to end. I love Steph, but maybe the tween girls could have come up with some more original questions than, "Like, is Edward real?" Of course, if I ever met her, I probably wouldn't be able to form a coherent thought either. She's a rock star!

As far as the special features, the deleted scenes had been all over the internet, so I'd already seen the majority of them. There were a couple that should have been left in, but then there was the blasphemous travesty where Bella trips Edward and he bites her finger in jest! As if! There was no need for Catherine Hardwicke to introduce the deleted scenes. We found ourselves giggling because she has one of those personalities where you aren't sure if she's on drugs or if that is just how she normally acts. Kind of like Joaquin Phoenix.

And, here is further evidence (like you needed more) that, A) I have a problem, B) my husband is an enabler. (And, I love him for it. ) We've got: Twilight Saga gift set complete with lithographs, "Twilight" DVD (Borders exclusive edition) with 10 photocards, "Twilight" score CD, "Twilight" Sweethearts candy, Twilight Director's Notebook, model of Edward's Volvo (courtesy of the lovely Pooles.)

Roy has a Ferrari room. I'm thinking I need a Twilight room. Ooohhh! I just had a thought! I could decorate the guest room just like Edward's bedroom. Unfortunately, there won't be a bed, so it would negate the whole "guest room" and so it would just be a shrine to all things Edward. That wouldn't be at all creepy.

So, I wanna hear from you. Did you celebrate the DVD release? Did you like the special features? Do you have a lot of "Twilight" memorabilia? How much do you want for it? Just kidding--Don't answer that last one.

Life in plastic is fantastic

The web is abuzz with this photo of the Chanel Perspex Briefcase that Karl Lagerfeld designed for the recent Paris showing of the brand's Fall Ready-To-Wear collection. Chanel's website states that it is made of "thermoformed packaging with pockets for an Ipod, No.5 perfume, and sunglasses."

*Thermoformed packaging (also known as a blister pack) is the annoying plastic that many items are now packaged in. The only purpose it serves is to annoy. Seriously, you shouldn't need a chainsaw to open a package of AA batteries.

There is no confirmation yet on whether this will be a bag that you can actually purchase or whether it was merely a prop for the show.

Personally, I love the pink version. (I have the pink quilted tote from a few years ago that I adore.) This briefcase is the pinnacle of organization and minimization (yes, that is a word). No more rummaging around in a bottomless pit looking for your phone. Wait! There isn't a place for your phone. Oh, well. We all have to make sacrifices in the name of fashion. I only hope that I get a job soon so that I can carry this superstar to the office.

What could you expect to pay for this baby if it does get released to the public? That depends. A quilted jersey flap bag similar to the one inside the briefcase shown retails for $3,800. Yes, I said jersey. Will the bag shown be included in the briefcase? Probably not. I doubt the other items in the briefcase are included either. 1 oz. of No.5 perfume is $260. (The 1.7 oz. spray bottle is only $80 and mine lasted two years, so I'd go that route.) The Ipod was probably around $150 and sunglasses $200, lipstick $30, powder $44, assuming they are all Chanel, of course, and you really can't run around with a clear Chanel briefcase containing Cover Girl makeup. Blasphemy!

Accessories alone would be about $4,500. And, while the accessories won't be included, I'm guessing you'll still pay for them as if they were. Tack on another $15 for the manufacturing cost of the plastic itself. Well, it is imprinted with the Chanel logo, so make that $100 for the plastic. Add another $50 for the straps....I'm guessing the final price tag will be around $5,000. (Designers round up to the nearest $1,000). Roy will be able to find it on Ebay next year for $150, so get your name on our wait list.

In all seriousness, I do LOVE the set they designed for the show. White walls that divided spaces in contrast to a black lacquered floor. The models walked through a series of doorways on all sides. Definitely a departure from the traditional catwalk and the minimalist approach is very different from last year's lavish set.

Hmmm. I wonder if I could get a job tagging along after Karl Lagerfeld. Maybe he needs someone to make him grilled cheese sandwiches on the weekend.

Gone country...for a night

Let's be honest, most of American Idol's faithful viewers dread country night. Die hard country fans probably watch Nashville Star and the like. While there is always at least one country contestant to watch in the top 12, there has only been one country singer to win in the show's seven previous seasons.

Last night was a tribute to the Grand Ole Opry with Randy Travis as the guest mentor. When I was little, my mom would play Randy Travis singing "Forever & Ever, Amen" and she would swoon. So, Randy is old school and was taken aback by many of the song choices, but he seemed pleasantly surprised by most of the twists they put in to make the songs unique. You aren't going to get a lot of harsh critisim from a good ole' boy. Seriously though, he's never seen a man wear nail polish? I know they get cable in Tennessee.

The winners of the night were all ballads. This shouldn't be a surprise because only contestants that are truly "country" would try to pull off an uptempo country song. (Try to imagine Anoop Dogg doing "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy.") Cringe. This is not the night to try to prove that you can cross over to other genres. No, the best bet is to go ballad and put in a little of your flavor, be it R&B or soulful piano. Several of the guys took strong female songs, which can always be dangerous, but surprisingly made them work.

I have ranked them in order of how I viewed last night's performances:

Matt Giraud, "So Small" by Carrie Underwood- Loved it. I haven't been a fan of his at all, but tonight he really stood out. I don't really like most of Carrie Underwood's songs, but I liked his version. I was drawn to a comparison of Joshua Kadison when he was playing the piano. If he can write songs, he may be able to garner even more appeal.

Kris Allen, "To Make You Feel My Love" by Garth Brooks- His version was so simple and yet the new arrangement really showcased his vocals. The fact that he played without his guitar really made you focus on his cute baby face. I was surprised to see him make it into the semi-finals, but now I get it.

Anoop Desai, "Always on My Mind" by Willie Nelson- I've always liked Anoop, but I knew he had to bring it since his last performance wasn't received well (though I enjoyed it.) He knew it, too, so he went to the other end of his spectrum and poured out his soul. Lovely, but the geometric-print hoodie was a little distracting.

Note to director: I wish the camera would focus on close ups when the contestants are doing ballads. They need to be able to look at the camera straight on to establish that important emotional connection. We don't need to see wide and aerial shots when they are standing still.

Adam Lambert, "Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash (sort of)- He left everyone speechless with his Middle Eastern take on a classic song. I understand why he would do that--it is not necessarily an "untouchable" song, but it is a very famous song that defined a very famous artist that still carries a lot of popularity. How are you going to do it better than JC? By taking it where no one would ever dare to go. The David Cook-song rearranging-comparison is obvious, but this just took it to a whole other level. I think Adam probably could have done the traditional version just fine, but props to him for taking the risk. He's still my favorite.

Megan Corkrey, "Walkin' After Midnight" by Patsy Cline-I never know what to think about Megan. I love her voice, but Colbie Callait-type songs is obviously what she needs to be singing. That is what is so difficult about this competition. There are great singers that are perfect in their niche, but when forced to go outside of that, they falter because it isn't comfortable. Considering that she doesn't have a background in singing, she could do really well with some more experience under her belt. And, I never would have known she was sick last night, so she did a great job covering that up.

Danny Gokey, "Jesus Take the Wheel" by Carrie Underwood- I'm not fond of that song, but his version was better- maybe because it was shorter. Danny is a great performer- that isn't news. There is just something about him that I can't put my finger on, but he doesn't seem 100% genuine. I think the dead wife publicity has had the opposite effect on me--I'd like to see him shed a few tears over her. Entertainment Weekly's March 20th issue picked him to win, but an online article put him second after Adam. Hopefully, that holds true.

Allison Iraheta, "Blame It On Your Heart" by Patty Loveless- I like Allison and she really did great in a genre that I expected her to struggle with. However, her song just didn't stand out enough on a night when everyone else was making unexpected changes to suit their style. She proved that she can cross over, but we really don't want her to.

Scott MacIntyre, "Wild Angels" by Martina McBride- My first reaction was that he finally proved why he was still around and that he wasn't just a sympathy finalist. He made the song a little different and it was really pleasing. Scott and Matt were the only two piano players tonight and both sang ballads. Scott was toward the front of the show and Matt was at the end. I don't know if contestants are randomly placed or if these two were purposely separated to avoid comparison, however, you can't help but compare them anyway. Matt obviously wins.

Paula commented that she would like to see Scott perform without the piano so that he could better connect with the audience. I'm pretty sure that all of America was screaming at their TV in that instant and it sounded something like, "NOOOOOO!" He is blind. He's not going to be able to connect visually in the same way that other contestants are, but he can and does connect on a raw emotional level. I think there is a reason that Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles wore glasses and sang at the piano. Scott is obviously more comfortable behind the piano and he plays well, so hopefully he will ignore Paula-- the rest of us do.

Alexis Grace, "Jolene" by Dolly Parton- Alexis is one of my favorites from the beginning, but Brooke White just did this song last season, and frankly, Brooke's was better.

Lil Rounds, "Independence Day" by Martina McBride- I don't think the song was appropriate and was just a bad choice for her. She has crazy vocal skills and could have chosen a million other power ballads that would have shown those off. She didn't change it in any way and I just wasn't impressed.

Michael Sarver, "Ain't Going Down" by Garth Brooks- Always forgettable, Michael is the only real country contestant and therefore the only contestant doing an upbeat number. He was obviously having fun, but unfortunately, it did not stand out when compared moving mixes from the other contestants.

FYI...I love AI, but don't expect a review every week. I just wanted to weigh in at least once this season. I'm still crossing my fingers for an Aerosmith week.

Not the Spice Girl...

Whenever we go to Winfield, the first thing I do is make a trip to my favorite little gift boutique, Posh. It is this lavishly decorated shop with everything from unique baby gifts to chai tea and everything remotely fashionable in between.

Next door is Josephine & Co., a home furnishings boutique, which is owned by the same people. If I was going to decorate a French lake home, that is where I'd shop. However, the six-foot tall greyhound statues probably wouldn't look good in my current little house. I love going over there for inspiration anyway.

I usually come away with jewelry and Posh did not disappoint this time. I found this nature inspired necklace by Two's Company. Unfortunately, the website only sells wholesale, so you have to locate a Two's Company retailer and see if they have what you are looking for, but that is why I love boutiques. Hopefully, you won't see 20 people wearing the same thing when you go out. I don't usually wear gold, but I'll make an exception for this piece.





We bought Anna a High Intencity Charms bracelet and whale charm on our vacation to the Delaware shore last summer and I added this pink "A" charm from Posh. Again, you have to find a retailer for that brand.

We also made a trip to Wal-Mart for some necessities while in Winfield and Anna was drawn to the toy section, as usual. I was shocked when I saw this vintage-inspired Barbie Case because it is just like the one I played with at my Grandma's house. I couldn't find it on Wal-Mart's website, but I'm sure they aren't that difficult to find in the store. It was $17 or so.


Anna is 3 years-old and already has 10 Barbies. T-E-N. That is more than I had my entire life. I blame Santa for bringing her the entire Disney princess Barbie set. What was he thinking?! In case you are wondering, that is 18 tiny shoes, 9 itty bitty necklaces and 9 microscopic crowns to keep track of. I've never been good at math, but even I realize that doesn't add up right. Hello--Ariel has fins, duh! And poor Mulan doesn't get a necklace or a crown. The Barbies are usually naked and I believe there are only a few of the accessories still remaining...just three short months after Christmas. Anyhoo, my point is that this doll case holds one doll and has space for some clothes and accessories. And, we got it anyway. Yep, Mattel blinded me with nostalgia. I'm such a sucker.

UPDATE at 7:45 pm: Anna now has 9 Barbies as she just snapped the neck of one. Apparently, this Barbie was hoarding the missing shoes. Let this be a lesson to all of you plastic girls out there--don't mess with Anna's accessories!

Tech idea for parents

The Sound Advice Project is a site that allows you to record a sound bite and turn it into a bracelet that your child can wear. The original purpose was to facilitate dialogue between parents and kids about drug use. Since every person has a unique voice, each bracelet will be unique. What a neat way to connect with your teenager.

Name the Monkey, cont...

We now have two suggestions for the name of my primate sidekick.

http://cookiebreakfast.blogspot.com/2009/03/name-monkey.html

There is a poll located on the right side below my Twitter feed. Monkey is anxiously awaiting the results.

Back from a nice weekend...

Sleeping with the enemy...

(For purposes of this blog, we'll call my daughter Anna.) We were at my in-laws' house this weekend. The guest room that we sleep in is filled with KU memorabilia, as my husband's family loves KU. Since Roy and I met at K-State, our loyalties obviously lie there. Here Anna is, all decked out in her KSU purple, napping in the Jayhawk bed. Don't worry, we'll learn her up right.

On Saturday, we all went for a walk with our friend, Tom. Anna and I were looking for bears. Sadly, we didn't find any bears, but we did see a beaver. We think. We watched the geese swimming and the guys showed her how to skip rocks.

That night, Tom, Roy and I went out to the local watering hole, O' Kelly's, for a drink, or 20. I apologize to anyone who was following my drunken tweets. Roy found them endlessly amusing. We had a rousing bargument about turning tricks versus dealing drugs to keep your family from starving. I won't go into where we all ended up on that one.

A girl that I went to high school with recognized me and filled me in on her life's journey. Our alma mater is three hours away and she was two years younger than me, so I was more than a little surprised to see her there. I honestly thought I was in trouble when she and her friend were staring at me from across the bar. I was afraid that I somehow offended her unintentionally and she was coming over to kick my butt. She was a clean cut red head the last time I saw her. Tonight, she had black hair, skull earrings and arms covered in tattoos. I seriously thought I was going to get pummelled. Turns out that she is a very nice young lady and a mother of two. Just goes to show.

We ended up staying until last call, when I apparently shook the hand of some guy who was out on the dance floor breaking it down. I told him something along the lines of "I'm proud of you for putting yourself out there and not caring what anyone thinks." He seemed genuinely flattered and not at all offended, so he must have been as intoxicated as I was. This is a classic example of why Jessica does not drink much. She ends up saying things that she is profoundly embarrassed about the next morning. Moving on...

Tomorrow, I'll share pics of my weekend purchases.

Twilight Necklace

I recently received this necklace that I ordered from Art Under Glass and it made me SO happy!! I'm going to wear it to my "Twilight" DVD release party. If you are laughing right now, you obviously haven't experienced the awesomeness that is the Twilight Saga and I am sad for you.



Becky sent me a personal email, let me add something at the last minute and then included a personal, handwritten note!! I was VERY impressed!! Support small businesses!!

Remember when the worst thing your kid could pick up at school was bad grammar? Me either.

I'm having one of my parental freak-out moments. I try to avoid watching the news because it only upsets me. I know that Roy will fill me in on anything important, so I let him be my filter. He knows not to share anything sad involving children that I absolutely don't need to know. Now that I'm home, I'm getting more info than I'm used to.

For instance, after working very hard to reformat my resume in Word (a program that I LOATHE for anything other than basic note-taking) I needed a little breather. I turned on the TV to watch a few minutes of mindless BS and unwind. Unfortunately, the first thing I saw was local news talking about someone being arrested for possession of these lovely little drugs disguised as children's vitamins.

http://cbs11tv.com/services/popoff.aspx?categoryId=11&videoId=39779@ktvt.dayport.com&videoPlayStatus=false&videoStoryIds=39779@ktvt.dayport.com&videoTime=30.302&

I immediately started hyperventilating because now I have to warn my 3 year-old not to take vitamins that anyone other than myself offers her. And I'm supposed to be safe in the knowledge that she will understand the danger and obey me. Please--I can't get the kid to brush her teeth 50% of the time. Is she honestly going to listen to me when I say, "Don't take yummy, fun-shaped candy from nice strangers (or unsuspecting children) that offer it"?! I can hear the dialogue in her little mind..."Mean Mommy tells me to do things that I don't want to do, like going to bed. Mean Mommy doesn't want me to do anything fun, like go to the store in only my princess underwear and Hello Kitty boots."

For the record, I was a staunch opponent of capital punishment before I had a child; now the issue is a little cloudy for me. People who exploit children like this should be subjected to the absolute worst form of punishment imaginable. I don't want to get too graphic, but it would involve wire cutters, a pack of dingoes and the Hanson CD.

Go home and hug your kid.

Fun for the Day

Apparently, Ashton Kutcher started this website, Blah Girls, last fall. I love Ashton, not like I'm attracted to him, because I seriously think Bruce Willis would beat up anyone that tried to break up his happy, albeit weird, family. But, I think he is hilarious (loved Punk'd and That '70s Show) and he seems to be quite the media mogul. He has 287,896 followers on Twitter (including me). He always has some project in production and his journey to stardom is fascinating. It is nice to know that there are some young people in Hollywood that are doing more with their life than living off the profits of their last Disney movie.

Oh, and "Just Married" is totally underrated. IMO, the most honest (and humorous) look at marriage since "Two For the Road."

Week One Wrap Up

Monkey and I did a lot of laundry last week. Working on the computer doesn't neccessarily net tangible results, so this made me feel like I got something accomplished. It is washed. Folding it and putting it away is a completely other matter.

On Wednesday, we joined my aunt, Jen, for scrapbooking. My daughter is three now, so I decided that maybe I should try working on her baby album. Yeah, I'm a little behind. I had Roy buy me one of those pre-made ones, so all you have to do is add the pictures. But, it was so beautiful that I never wanted to mess it up, which I was sure I would do if I attempted to actually put something in it. Jen has a million scrapbooking tools...seriously amazing. Even with a lunch break to celebrate her birthday, I actually managed to finish 5 pages. Very impressive. And then Monkey did a number 2 on the book, so now I have to start over. My mom told me, "Never trust a monkey."

We spent the next 2 days resume-building. I found a fabulous job that I will never be considered for, but I put a lot of effort into selling myself anyway. Monkey is actually a very helpful spell-checker.

Name the Monkey!

I got a monkey. Actually, Roy gave me his monkey. If you hit it just right, it lets out a terrifying scream that is guaranteed to scare away all manner of monster, including, but not limited to Sasquatch, Nessie and Zipperump-a-Zoos.

Right now, we're leaving the Munchkin in school so that I can job hunt without interruption. I'll be honest...I'm a little terrified about what would happen if I was solely responsible for her daily education. It would likely consist of PBS Kids, Draw a Tree class, play with dolls, watch TMZ. And if I was the in charge of her daily nutrition...well, let's just say that on the weekends, we have grilled cheese for lunch both days. Because I'm that creative in the kitchen.

Anyway, it gets a little lonely around here during the day. I'm used to all the privacy of a fishbowl back at the cube farm, so this takes a little getting used to. I decided that I needed a sidekick to converse with---enter Monkey. He needs a name, but I'm having trouble committing to one. Maybe you can help.